Ep 52: Third Chapters, Raising Adults, and Loving Ourselves with Julie Lythcott-Haims

Ep 52: Third Chapters, Raising Adults, and Loving Ourselves with Julie Lythcott-Haims


This conversation with best-selling New York Times author and Ted talk speaker Julie Lythcott-Haims was over two years in the making and yet came just at the right time.

Author of How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success and Real American: A Memoir, Julie’s interested in the human experience and writes non-fiction, creative non-fiction, and poetry with the aim of helping humans thrive.

She has a JD from Harvard Law School, an MFA in writing from California College of the Arts and holds her BA in American Studies from Stanford University, where she later returned to serve as Dean of Freshman and Undergraduate Advising, among other roles.  She currently lives in Silicon Valley with her partner of more than thirty years, her two teenagers, and her mother.

Born to an African-American father and a British mother, Julie moved often in her childhood from Nigeria to New York to Wisconsin to Washington D.C., where her father was part of the Carter Administration, and then back to Wisconsin again. Along the way, she struggled to find her identity as a bi-racial woman who faced stereotypes and micro-aggressions about her blackness that sent her on a journey from self-loathing to self-love, something she reflects on with powerful honesty in her memoir.

Themes of self-exploration, self-sufficiency and service weave thread through this incredibly enriching conversation with Julie. We discuss her healing journey with her mother and how that impacts how she parents her children today. Julie shares the lessons that she learned about how to successfully raise adults from her years as the Dean at Stanford and extensive research that informs her best-selling book and popular Ted talk on the subject.

She reveals the way that she has daringly made career pivots that others thought were crazy, what’s next on the horizon for her, and how she may even create her own radio show one day. And, we talk candidly about her journey to embracing self-care, about her commitment to her partner of over thirty years, and to the impact on her body and sexuality of moving toward menopause.

I was struck by Julie’s continued evolution in her own awareness, and her commitment to personal growth and to pursuing her own purposeful path, parallels evident in the wisdom she holds for us about how to raise our children to be healthy adults. Finally, I’m inspired by her bold challenge to us, to look at how stereotypes and biases about black people show up in ourselves, and to do the conscious work of taking them apart.

This conversation is a powerful one that has already begun to shift my awareness. I look forward to hearing what Julie’s life lessons, wisdom, and revelations shift for you when you listen. 

Much appreciation, 

P.S. Know someone who you think would appreciate this episode? Push forward and share this conversation!

In This Episode We Talk About:

  • Julie’s journey of healing with her mother, now 80 years old, and how a third chapter of their relationship led to reciprocal learning across three generations, between Julie’s mother, Julie, and Julie’s daughter.
  • What happens when our egos impact our parenting and the power of realizing that we are not our kids; they’re not a mini-me, a pet, a trophy or a bonsai tree. They are their own person.

  • What Julie’s experience as a Stanford Dean taught her about how to raise adults, including the two most essential things she learned kids need: to do chores and to be loved.

  • How a commitment to life-long learning inspired Julie to make daring career pivots, from attorney to school administrator to writer.

  • The three more books  that Julie knows she has inside of her.

  • Julie’s own evolution in her understanding of what self-care means and the ways that she invests in herself today.

  • The practices Julie has committed to with her husband to keep their thirty plus year connection strong.

  • The impact of peri-menopause and menopause in how we feel in our bodies and on our libido in particular, and my commitment to focus a future episode on this subject.

  • The importance of becoming aware of the stereotypes we hold about black people and Julie’s challenge to us to consciously undo them.

Resources and Topics Mentioned:

This Episode is Dedicated by:

Tamara Sobomehin, chasing the human dream, working to unleash the brilliance and potential of people by cultivating a culture of positive creation supported by the foundation of effective human and technical systems. Dedicated in honor of Tamara’s mother Paula Denise Lacy.  

Street Code Academy – The organization Tamara runs with her husband Tunde. 
Recharge Ravenswood – The website to learn more about Tamara’s campaign for Ravenswood City School Board. 
Team Esface – The exceptional basketball program, founded by the Sobomehin brothers, that Ryan participated in and where we first met Tamara and her family. 

This Week’s Challenge:

For this week’s challenge, I encourage you to read Julie’s powerful memoir, The Real American, to explore the impact of stereotypes about black people on her life experience. Then, follow Julie’s invitation to notice when stereotypes about black people kick in for us. She says, “If you’re not loving black people, ask yourself why? Be interested in that. Black people are humans worthy of love, compassion and care like anybody else is. If you notice a stereotype kicks in when you see a black person, see if you can immediately say to yourself – what would I do if this was a white person? Or a person of any race other than black? When a stereotype pops up, name it and tell yourself I’m discarding it. Try interacting with that person as if they were your own brother, sister, grandmother, father, friend or family.”  It’s our job to acknowledge the impact of stereotypes and biases and undo it.

Learn More About Julie:

Julies Website
Facebook
Twitter
Instagram

Announcements:

Mother’s Quest Circle

If you’re on a quest to live an E.P.I.C. life, but you’ve been feeling challenged, isolated, or unsure of the path ahead, the Mother’s Quest Circle may be the source of connection you’re looking for.

The Mother’s Quest Circle provides inspiration, coaching and community for an intimate group of no more than 10 women who are ready to say “yes” to:

✨Reflect together, in a community of like-minded mothers, on what matters most
✨To consciously live their version (not someone else’s) of an E.P.I.C. life
✨To take bold action toward one of the E.P.I.C. life guideposts before the end of the sessions
✨To hold space for sharing, coaching, and championing one another so we are “in community” on our journey

If you’re looking to end the year strong, now is a great time to make an investment in yourself and what matters most to you. Apply here

Say It. Sweat It. Get It. Challenge

Sign up today to come along with me on Erin’s week-long challenge where she will give you super short, easy to follow workouts, that combine movement and mantras, to inspire you, physically, mentally and spiritually. During the challenge, I’ll release an episode on the podcast with Erin to give you insight into her journey and why movement plays such a powerful role in her life.

Starts Mon. Nov. 5th! Sign up Today!

Support the Podcast

If you’d like to make a contribution to Mother’s Quest to support Season Three of the Podcast and/or help provide coaching scholarships for mothers, follow this link to make a contribution.

If you would like to “dedicate” an upcoming episode to a special mother in your life, email me at julie@mothersquest.com

Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.

Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. lifeEngaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C).

Join our community of mothers to light the way and sustain you on your quest at https://www.facebook.com/groups/mothersquest/

Ep 26: Surrender and Embracing Difference with Debbie Reber of TILT Parenting for “Differently-Wired” Kids

Ep 26: Surrender and Embracing Difference with Debbie Reber of TILT Parenting for “Differently-Wired” Kids


Welcome to this episode #26 of the Mother’s Quest Podcast, “Surrender and Embracing Difference” with TiLT Parenting for Differently-Wired Kids founder Debbie Reber. This conversation about seeing diversity as an asset, valuing and embracing difference, couldn’t come at a better time.

Debbie Reber is the founder of TiLT, an online destination aimed at helping parents raising differently-wired kids do so from a place of confidence, connection, and peace. She’s also host of the TiLT Parenting Podcast, a life coach, speaker and a New York Times bestselling author of books aimed at raising self-esteem for young girls. Before becoming a writer, Debbie worked in children’s television, for a relief and development organization and at UNICEF.

Despite this long list of accomplishments, perhaps the greatest thing Debbie has done is become parent, advocate, homeschooler and champion for her own son Asher who is 13, has Aspergers, ADHD and is profoundly gifted.

After years of struggle with Asher, Debbie and her husband took a leap of faith in 2013, moving from the U.S. to Amsterdam where she stepped into her own hero’s journey to acceptance, surrender, and presence. In the process, she and Asher have come to an exceptional place, and share their lessons learned, wisdom and real life experiences to make sure other parents of differently-wired kids don’t have to journey alone.

Debbie and I had an amazing conversation, about faith, personal transformation through parenting and how to live an E.P.I.C. life of alignment. Debbie invites us to question hidden beliefs about neurodiversity, explore the judgements we make about children who are “differently-wired” and invite us to become more compassionate as a result. She’s also invited us to take her TILT 7 day challenge to support ourselves to gently shift our awareness.

This conversation was a year in the making and it was really powerful for me. I was reminded about the gifts our children bring us, even when they don’t come in the ways that we expected and it renewed my commitment to show up fully for my own children, embracing their differences and surrendering to the knowledge that life is a journey and not a destination.

Special Message for All of Us

I want to note that I bring this episode to you at a unique moment. At the time of this recording, the nation has endured tragedy and division in the wake of events at Charlottesville, fueled by hatred and fear about our differences. Days later, the universe provided us with awareness that we are bound together by something bigger than ourselves as people everywhere took in the total solar eclipse with awe.

The definition of eclipse means to darken and block out the light. We eclipse the light and love, and our common humanity, when we fail to recognize, understand, and celebrate our differences, whether that difference comes from the way our brains think in the case of differently-wired kids, the color of our skin, or the religion we follow. But, as Debbie so eloquently describes in our conversation, when we can see diversity as an asset and embrace difference, everything changes.

When I noticed that Miki DeVivo, another mom raising differently-wired kids, was launching her beautiful book of poetry this week, “The Naming of Real Things,” I asked if she would choose a piece for me to share as a lead into what felt like a sacred conversation with Debbie, as a prayer and invitation for all of us, during this challenging time, to move from darkness into more light, love and compassion for one another. Here it is…

From Miki DeVivo’s  new book of poetry, the Naming of Real Things

(shared with permission)

Love More

Love more fully.
Let your love fill in all the cracks
Like Japanese gold.
Raise your heart
To your lips and drink till you are full.

Love more widely.
Let your love widen beyond all the borders
Inflicted by man.
Raise your arms
To the sky in blessings spread wide.

Love more deeply.
Let your love deepen beneath the surface
Of skin and kin and the way we each choose to worship.
Raise your eyes
To see the raw humanity standing before you, pain and wisdom so deep.

Love more fiercely.
Let your love rage like fire and do not be silent.
Raise your voice
To power again and again, unflinching and fierce.

Love more wildly.
Let your love wild like flowers blanketing a meadow in the spring.
Raise your feet
To dance among the blossoms, growing wild.

Love more warmly.
Let your love warm the icicles of contempt that pierce your heart.
Raise your glass
To the fountain of hope until your cup runneth over, sweet and warm.

Love more freely.
Let your love free from the small box you were told would keep it safe.
Raise your hands
To pick the locks and set yourself free.

This Week’s Challenge:

Question and explore your beliefs about neurodiversity. Raise your awareness and step into more compassion with Debbie’s 7 Day Challenge.

Topics discussed in this episode:

  • How Debbie and I have connected as mothers of differently-wired boys, since Jonathan Fields and Harmony Eichsteadt, of The Good Life Project, made an introduction between us a year ago.

  • How Debbie wrestled with an Evangelical Christian faith upbringing, the questions she explored about her own spirituality, and how she came to believe there is something greater that connects us all.

  • The right turn Debbie’s career took from empowering young girls to championing her own “differently-wired” son and then building a community to support parents to champion their own.

  • The unexpected gifts that raising Asher has brought to Debbie and her life and the key that helped her shift into acceptance.

  • How Debbie followed her intuition and changed everything for the better, to make a big leap of faith, move to Amsterdam, and begin homeschooling Asher.

  • Nature is Debbie’s church and how lacing up their shoes for long walks outside provides Debbie and Asher opportunity for deep connection.

  • Debbie’s new book, coming out in spring 2018, to help parents of differently-wired kids realize they are not alone.

  • How Debbie’s “self-interest” helps her prioritize creating space and time for herself.

  • The quote from Shakepeare Debbie’s son Asher shared, on his podcast episode, as he reflected on the importance of risk and leaps of faith required in order to grow.

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Announcements

Women Podcasters in Solidarity
In this week after the events that took place in Charlottesville, I’m even more committed to a quest I’ve been on to understand the roots of racism and bigotry, how it still shows up today, and how I can become a better ally and advocate to fight against it.

I’m raising awareness for myself, and inviting you to do the same, through a special podcast episode coming out in September.

If you want to listen to that episode, be sure to subscribe to the podcast and sign up for email updates at mothersquest.com. And if you are a women podcaster yourself, I’d love for you to make the pledge to use the power of your platform for this cause. You can learn more and join the initiative by signing up at mothersquest.com/solidarity.

Q and A with Debbie Reber
Join us on September 1st, Friday at 10:30 AM PST for a Q and A in the Mother’s Quest Facebook Group with Debbie to continue our conversation and check in on the challenge. Click this link to join the Mother’s Quest Facebook Group and get invited to the event.

Visit the Website
If you haven’t yet visited the website, head over to www.mothersquest.com to explore some of the ways you can get more connected. At the site, you can sign up for our email list (to get show notes delivered to your inbox and our new “Mothers on a Quest” features), click the link to join the Facebook group and press record to leave a voice message for me. You can also download the FREE Live Your E.P.I.C. Life Planning and Reflection Sheets.

Sign up! – Free 30 minute Discovery Session
I’m rolling out my new coaching offerings and having great conversations with women who are ready to live a more E.P.I.C. life and interested in coaching. If you’ve had a spark moment setting you on a new path or are at a crossroads but feel unsure, guilty or overwhelmed, I’d love to talk with you about how working with me could help light the way, get you clear about what you want, shift your mindset from fear to faith, and get you moving into action.

I’ve been there, I’m still on the journey myself, and I’d love to bring all I’ve learned from a decade of coaching, 13 years of motherhood and all the lessons from my podcast guests to support you. Send me an email at julie@mothersquest.com or sign up for a free discovery call by clicking this link if you’re interested in learning more.

Acknowledgements

A big THANK YOU to our “patrons” for helping to bring these conversations to myself and other mothers through financial and/or in-kind support:

  • Katharine Earhart of Alesco Advisors
  • Jessica Kupferman of She Podcasts
  • Resistance Artist Jen Jenkins Dohner
  • Genese Harris
  • Tonya Rineer, founder of The Profit Party
  • Liane Louie-Badua
  • Cristin Downs of the Notable Woman Podcast
  • Erin Kendall of Fit Mom Go
  • Niko Osoteo of Bear Beat Productions
  • Erik Newton of The Together Show
  • Claire Fry
  • Divya Silbermann
  • Rachel Winter
  • Caren and Debbie Lieberman
  • Cameron Miranda
  • Fran and David Lieberman
  • Debbie and Alan Goore
  • Jenise and Marianne of the Sustainable Living Podcast

Support the Podcast

If you’d like to make a contribution to Mother’s Quest to support Season Two of the Podcast and/or help provide coaching scholarships for mothers, follow this link to make a contribution http://mothersquest.com/be-a-supporter/

If you would like to “dedicate” an upcoming episode to a special mother in your life, email me at julie@mothersquest.com

Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.

Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. lifeEngaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C).

Join our community of mothers to light the way and sustain you on your quest at https://www.facebook.com/groups/mothersquest/

Subscribe to the Podcast! We are available in these channels:

    

Episode #5: Live your E.P.I.C. Life to Help Your Children Thrive
Ep 23: Miracle Mornings, Owning our Voice, and the Homeschooling Mom in all of Us with Lindsay McCarthy

Ep 23: Miracle Mornings, Owning our Voice, and the Homeschooling Mom in all of Us with Lindsay McCarthy

I’m excited to bring you this Episode #23 of the Mother’s Quest Podcast. I’m just back from an amazing week at one of my most favorite places, UCLA’s Bruin Woods Family Camp in Lake Arrowhead, where I felt like I had an amazing reset…a chance to unplug and notice some patterns from a fresh perspective.

It’s so perfect then, that I came back to put the finishing touches on this episode with author of the Miracle Morning for Parents and Families, Lindsay McCarthy. I’ve been wanting to have Lindsay on the podcast for a while now; I knew I had a lot to learn from her about how to change my relationship with mornings, but I didn’t realize our conversation would inspire a collaborative 30 day Mother’s Quest Miracle Morning Challenge that will start Monday, July 17th.

Lindsay is a wife and homeschool mom of two kids. She is the co-author of The Miracle Morning for Parents and Families, has a facebook community of the same name, and is creator of GratefulParent.com where she blogs.

Lindsay and I have a lot in common in that neither of us could have imagined we would step into owning and sharing our voice and our story with others until fairly recently, she through her book and me through the podcast.

We go deep in this conversation about the epic journey that brought Lindsay from attending a conference where she met Miracle Morning author Hal Alred to essentially writing a manual for bringing the Miracle Morning practice to parents and families.

We talk about our mutual love of frameworks and acronyms and how she and her husband adapted the Miracle Morning’s SAVERS to create their own acronym, CHARMS, which brings Creativity, Health, Affirmations, Reading, Meditation, and Service to her children every morning.

I love how Lindsay brings intentionality and mindfulness to her parenting and how she’s living her own version of an E.P.I.C. life, one rooted in being an amazing mom and co-creating incredible learning experiences for her children. She helped me change my perception of what homeschooling can look like and realize that we are all like a homeschooling mom when we seek opportunities for our children to pursue their curiosity and passions.

I’m also impressed by how committed Lindsay is to this Miracle Morning practice which has dramatically changed her family’s life and the lives of so many others through her book and group.

I’m thrilled I finally got a chance to talk with Lindsay and that together we will create this collaborative challenge. I have a strong feeling that this Miracle Morning practice will make a huge difference for me and I know I need some support and accountability to make it happen. I can’t imagine a better guide than Lindsay and I hope you’ll choose to come along with us.

This Week’s Challenge:

Join us for the 30-Day Mother’s Quest Miracle Morning Challenge. Sign up to follow us with daily prompts and reflections in the Mother’s Quest Facebook Group.

Topics discussed in this episode:

  • Lindsay’s mother modeled creating opportunities for her children by setting up a field hockey team for her and other girls in their community.

  • How attending Hal Elrod’s One Life Fully Lived conference in 2014 provided an opportunity for Lindsay to create what became like an operating manual for her family

  • The importance of having a morning practice.

  • How the C.H.A.R.M.S. (Creativity, Health, Affirmations, Reading, Meditation, Service) framework works in their family and how it can be adapted for other families.

  • Tips on “Habit Stacking” and adding mindfulness and purpose to everyday activities.

  • Working with a spiritual coach to support self discovery.

  • Slowing down to have the space to create what you truly want.

  • How Lindsay came to homeschooling her children, how she accesses other resources outside of her home as part of that, and how we are all homeschoolers in some way with our children

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Announcements

If you haven’t yet visited the website, head over to www.mothersquest.com to explore some of the ways you can get more connected. At the site, you can sign up for our email list (to get show notes delivered to your inbox and our new “Mothers on a Quest” features), click the link to join the Facebook group and press record to leave a voice message for me. You can also download the FREE Live Your E.P.I.C. Life Planning and Reflection Sheets.

Sign up! – Free 30 minute Discovery Session

I’m rolling out my new coaching offerings and I’ve been having great conversations with women who are ready to live a more E.P.I.C. life and interested in coaching. If you’ve had a spark moment setting you on a new path or are at a crossroads but feel unsure, guilty or overwhelmed, I’d love to talk with you about how working with me could help light the way, get you clear about what you want, shift your mindset from fear to faith, and get you moving into action. I’ve been there, I’m still on the journey myself, and I’d love to bring all I’ve learned from a decade of coaching, 13 years of motherhood and all the lessons from my podcast guests to support you. Send me an email at julie@mothersquest.com or sign up for a free discovery call at mothersquest.com if you’re interested in learning more.

Acknowledgements

A big THANK YOU to our “patrons” for helping to bring these conversations to myself and other mothers through financial and/or in-kind support:

  • Tonya Rineer, founder of The Profit Party, who provided this week’s dedication

  • Liane Louie-Badua

  • Cristin Downs of the Notable Woman Podcast

  • Erin Kendall of Fit Mom Go

  • Niko Osoteo of Bear Beat Productions

  • Erik Newton of The Together Show

  • Claire Fry

  • Divya Silbermann

  • Rachel Winter

  • Caren and Debbie Lieberman

  • Cameron Miranda

  • Fran and David Lieberman

  • Debbie and Alan Goore

  • Jenise and Marianne of the Sustainable Living Podcast

Support the Podcast

If you’d like to make a contribution to Mother’s Quest to support Season Two of the Podcast and/or help provide coaching scholarships for mothers, follow this link to make a contribution http://mothersquest.com/be-a-supporter/

If you would like to “dedicate” an upcoming episode to a special mother in your life, email me at julie@mothersquest.com

Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.

Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, Engaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C).

Join our community of mothers to light the way and sustain you on your quest at https://www.facebook.com/groups/mothersquest/

Subscribe to the Podcast! We are available in these channels:

    

Episode #5: Live your E.P.I.C. Life to Help Your Children Thrive
Ep 18: YOLO (You Only Live Once) and other Milestone Reflections with Ryan Neale

Ep 18: YOLO (You Only Live Once) and other Milestone Reflections with Ryan Neale

I’m so honored and excited to bring you this Episode #18 of the Mother’s Quest Podcast with a very special guest, my own son Ryan Neale.

One of the great lessons I’ve learned is the importance of marking milestones and honoring endings so that you can thoughtfully open a new chapter.

As Ryan approaches his bar mitzvah in April, becoming a “Jewish adult” and entering his teens, we decided we would spend his thirteenth birthday together, going on a “milestone hike” ‘and then recording an episode of the podcast at a recording studio in San Francisco.

It was a magical day of reflection, revelations for both of us, and a lot of laughter. I’m honored to bring highlights of all of that to you through this episode.

You’ll hear Ryan share eloquently and honestly about his appreciation for the support that helped him conquer his developmental delays, how his own fears manifest in his life today, and how, in his next chapter, he wants to trust more and move through his fear. Because, he says, he wants to live with a YOLO (You Only Live Once) mindset.

Ryan reflects on snapshot moments from his life, about his deep love for his younger brother, his experience finding a group of friends and a school program where he could thrive, receiving the academic achievement award, and the moments he hopes he’ll be able to look back on with pride at the next milestone.

Ryan also gets a turn to ask me his own questions and give me feedback. I had an opportunity to share the biggest lesson my mother gave me, to always appreciate every stage of life you’re in when you’re in it, and acknowledge what I wish I could change about myself.  

I also heard Ryan reflect back that in being “a little selfish” in creating Mother’s Quest I’ve given him so much more than if I only focused on my children.

There’s a game we play with Erik Newton (whose studio we recorded in) as our game show host, a lot of laughter and some comical out-takes that you’ll want to stick around for at the very end.

I felt so blessed to create this experience with Ryan and to share it with you. I take with me the importance of marking these rites of passage thoughtfully with our children, what a privilege it is to be witness to the development of another human being as a mother, a reminder of how powerfully our children see and know us and help us grow, and what fun it can be to create new experiences together.

Ryan and I will never forget how we spent his thirteenth birthday together. We hope you’ll leave this episode inspired to mark a milestone in your life, with your children, and make some life-long memories of your own.

Topics discussed in this episode:

  • Our meaningful and magical milestone hike through Laurelwood Park

  • How you cannot see yourself fully through the mirror but can through your loved ones

  • Life happens fast, appreciate every aspect of your life as you’re in it because before you know it you’ll be on to the next 

  • Take life in small steps and the snapshot moments that Ryan most remembers from his 13 years

  • Ryan’s love for his brother Jacob and what Ryan said the day Jacob was born

  • The impact living my E.P.I.C. life has had on Ryan

  • How things that are scary can at the same time be beautiful and Ryan’s commitment not to let his fears stop him from living his YOLO (You Only Live Once) life

  • The pact Ryan and I made to help us with our biggest area of growth, our management of time

  • Erik’s takeaway: “Parenting is an opportunity to be vulnerable in a way that is unprecedented.”

Resources mentioned in this episode:

  • Headstart, a special program for preschool aged children from low-income communities that provides access to early childhood education

  • The GATE Program (Gifted And Talented Education Program) national links and background information. Ryan participates in our local school district’s program.

  • Divergent Series by Veronica Roth

  • “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” – Wayne Gretzky

  • Erik Newton, The Together Show

  • Sports Illustrated Kid Reporter, a unique program Ryan has applied to which gives selected children ages 10 – 14 an opportunity to write and broadcast about sports

  • UCLA Bruin Woods where I was a counselor in college and where we all go to “camp” each summer as a family

Announcements:

 I hope this conversation sparked something that will inspire you to mark a milestone in your E.P.I.C. life. If you live in the bay area and want to participate in a group milestone hike I will be leading this spring or if you want to sign up for a coaching session so I can help you mark a milestone wherever you are, send an email to julie@mothersquest.com and put milestone in the subject heading.

The season is coming to a close and will start up again in May. Please make sure you’ve subscribed, signed up for email updates at mothersquest.com and joined the Facebook group so we can keep in touch and you’ll get notified when the next episode comes out.

Be Part of the Finale!!

I’ve extended the deadline for your submissions to be featured in the finale through April 6th and will release the finale later in April.

So, if you haven’t yet called in, and there is a moment from the season that made a difference for you, please go to mothersquest.com, look for the purple phone icon, and leave me a message with your name, favorite moment from the podcast and how that moment impacted you. I would love to include your voice in the season finale.

Let’s Stay in Touch

If you haven’t yet visited the website, I want to invite you to head over to mothersquest.com to explore some of the ways you can get more connected. At the site, you can sign up for our email list to have show notes delivered to your inbox, click the link to join the Facebook group and press record to leave a voice message for me.

Finally, I invite you to schedule a free 15 minute planning session where I can help you bring more intention to your life using the Live Your E.P.I.C. Life Planning and Reflection Sheets which you can download for FREE at www.mothersquest.com/reflectionsheets. Email me at julie@mothersquest.com to set a time.

A big THANK YOU to our “patrons” for helping to bring these conversations to myself and other mothers through financial and/or in-kind support:

  • Erik Newton and The Together Show Podcast who dedicated this week’s episode of the podcast
  • Claire Fry
  • Divya Silbermann
  • Rachel Winter
  • Caren and Debbie Lieberman
  • Cameron Miranda
  • Fran and David Lieberman
  • Debbie and Alan Goore
  • Jenise and Marianne of the Sustainable Living Podcast

 


Want to join the patrons above and help support more meaningful conversations such as these? Visit the Mother’s Quest Patreon Page to become a regular patron or visit this link www.mothersquest.com/be-a-supporter to make a one-time donation.

If you would like to “dedicate” an upcoming episode to a special mother in your life, email me at julie@mothersquest.com


Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.

Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, engaging mindfully with their children (E), passionately and purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), investing in themselves (I), and connecting to a strong support network (C).

Join our community of mothers to light the way and sustain you on your quest at https://www.facebook.com/groups/mothersquest/

Subscribe to the Podcast! We are available in these channels:

    

Episode #5: Live your E.P.I.C. Life to Help Your Children Thrive
Ep 08: Empathy, Acts of Kindness and Climbing Mountains with Erika Greff

Ep 08: Empathy, Acts of Kindness and Climbing Mountains with Erika Greff

In this interview, I am excited to share a thoughtful and honest conversation with wife, mother, freelance television anchor/reporter, volunteer for philanthropic causes and entrepreneur, Erika Greff.

Erika lives in the heart of New York City with her husband and two sons, ages 13 and 12. I came to know her over the summer, when we were both grieving for the loss of our mutual friend, Leslie Fischer. Erika and I talk about how her boys comforted her the day of Leslie’s funeral and wanted to take positive action in Leslie’s honor that day.

In our conversation, she shares the ways in which she and her husband have encouraged her sons to focus on empathy, gratitude and daily acts of service, which her sons document on a website they created called budgetphilanthropist.com.

We also discuss how Erika has found herself at a career crossroads, after 18 years as an on-air correspondent for PBS’s Nightly Business Report. And, how freelance journalism has given her an opportunity to engage herself and her boys in conscious decision-making about the projects she pursues.

She gets honest about her new entrepreneurial passion, a media company to inform children about the news in their world. And she shares how she perseveres through frustration to find the path to her vision, even going mountain-climbing with her boys to symbolically face the fear of failure in her new venture.

I hope you get inspired, as I did, about consciously instilling the values of kindness, empathy and acts of service in your children. And that you realize you are not alone if you too are struggling to make a new vision become real.  

I feel enriched by the generosity Erika so freely shares and excited to explore the resources she recommended to become a “financial grownup” and to cultivate daily kindness in my children. I am grateful she and I have connected and I know our friend Leslie would be too.

Topics discussed in this episode:

  • How Erika’s parents taught her that self esteem is about the things you do, not the things you have
  • The way Erika’s children practice and document daily acts of kindness
  • Driving in the car and bedtime as great opportunities to connect with your children
  • Involving your children in decision-making about your own life and career
  • The challenges of pursuing a new venture and working through fear of failure
  • The concept of a favor bank – help other people and they will help you in return

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Do you enjoy this podcast and want to support more meaningful conversations such as these? Visit the Mother’s Quest Patreon Page to become a regular patron or visit this link – www.mothersquest.com/be-a-supporter to make a one-time donation.

Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.

Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, engaging mindfully with their children (E), passionately and purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), investing in themselves (I), and connecting to a strong support network (C).

Join our community of mothers to light the way and sustain you on your quest at https://www.facebook.com/groups/mothersquest/

Subscribe to the Podcast! We are available in these channels:

    

Episode #5: Live your E.P.I.C. Life to Help Your Children Thrive
Ep 06: Healthy and Happy with Dr. Elisa Song

Ep 06: Healthy and Happy with Dr. Elisa Song

In this episode, I was honored to have a conversation with my children’s holistic pediatrician Dr. Elisa Song, founder of Whole Family Wellness, creator of the online resource Healthy Kids Happy Kids and an amazing mother to her daughter and son.

If you tuned into Episode 5, you know Elisa gave me permission to replay her interview of me from her Thriving Child Summit, where we talked about my motherhood journey with my older son, how Elisa became a key part of the puzzle to help him thrive, and what led me to create Mother’s Quest. In this interview, I got to turn the tables and learn about the influences that shaped Elisa and how she approaches living an E.P.I.C. life.

Elisa is a board-certified, Stanford-, NYU-, and UCSF-trained holistic pediatrician. In 2005, she forged a daring path, by going out on her own and founding Whole Family Wellness, an integrative pediatric practice in Belmont, CA – one of the first and most highly regarded holistic pediatric practices in the country. She’s also a lecturer for the Center for Education and Development in Clinical Homeopathy (CEDH), Academy for Pain Research, Institute for Functional Medicine, and Holistic Pediatric Association, among others.

Through Whole Family Wellness, and now with her online resource Healthy Kids Happy Kids, Elisa helps thousands of parents, like me, get to the root causes of health concerns for our children. And, she helps us understand how to heal them from the inside out, utilizing conventional pediatrics along with functional medicine, holistic nutrition, homeopathy, acupuncture, herbal medicine, and essential oils.

In this conversation, Elisa and I talk about how the legacy of brave women in her life, making courageous choices, impacted her and her sisters and set them all on a path to become healers and helpers. Her grandmother and mother, who both came to America from Korea, instilled independence, strength, and “grit” in her, which she relied on to follow her passion in integrative medicine. We also talk about connected parenting, the importance of scheduling special time with our children, and the need to prioritize our own health and well-being, something Elisa and I admit we both need to focus more on.

I hope you enjoy this episode as much as I did. Elisa is such an inspiration and source of wisdom and healing for my family. I am thrilled to share her with you.

Topics discussed in this episode:

  • How my own “growth mindset” was challenged when Elisa and I lost the recording of our first interview
  • The legacy of strong, independent women in Elisa’s life and how it impacted her journey
  • Parenting by connection and scheduling in “special time”
  • Finding time for silence, including in your own mind
  • True healing, not just putting a bandaid on children’s symptoms
  • Eudaimonia, which is a Greek word meaning happiness and human flourishing

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.

Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, engaging mindfully with their children (E), passionately and purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), investing in themselves (I), and connecting to a strong support network (C).

Join our community of mothers to light the way and sustain you on your quest at https://www.facebook.com/groups/mothersquest/

Subscribe to the Podcast! We are available in these channels:

    

Episode #5: Live your E.P.I.C. Life to Help Your Children Thrive