When my father, David Lieberman, died in December, I put the podcast on pause. And in many ways, it felt like I also put parts of my life on pause. But after months of navigating waves of grief, I’m finding my way back into my life and back to my voice.
Through laughter and tears, I recorded a special solocast to officially close out Season Six of the Mother’s Quest Podcast so I can begin again. It felt like part of my healing to share my stories with you and I’m hopeful that there may be something in these reflections that can be meaningful and healing for you too.
Death is one of the few things we can all count on in our lives. And yet it’s one of the things we are most reluctant to talk about. I hope this exploration of my experience during my father’s death, and the lessons I learned, might support you to open yourself to conversations about death. In so doing, you’ll open yourself more fully to life and love.
“There is nothing so whole as a broken heart” – a quote I cut out in a magazine while working on my vision board the other day. It resonated immediately. There were so many people, only a few of you who I mention by name in this episode (but you know who you are!) whose wisdom, compassion, and caring made moving through this painful process not only bearable but at times beautiful. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You helped me and my family stay whole and I am so grateful.
Lessons To Guide You Through the Death of a Loved One In this episode, I walk you through the eight lessons I learned through my father’s death, my grief, and most importantly– my love for my Dad and my family.
1) Look for the Signs
2) Find Your Guides
3) Closure Can be Healing
4) Lean Into Your Rituals. Make Them Your Own.
5) Let Laughter In and Invite the Possibility that the Unexpected Can be a Gift
These reflections are based on my experience navigating the death of my father who lived a full and happy life until the age of 84. I am certain that losing a child or someone of any age to a traumatic situation is a whole different experience. I do want to share a link to an episode I recorded with Trayvon Martin’s mother, Sybrina Fulton, who tragically lost her son in senseless gun violence. I invite you to listen to this episode for a different and important perspective on grief: From Grief to Advocacy and a Circle of Mothers with Trayvon Martin’s mother Sybrina Fulton.
This Episode’s Challenge:
While it’s not easy to talk about, having conversations about death is one of the best ways to prepare ourselves and those around us for when the time comes– because we’ll never know when it might happen. So say “yes” to conversations about death and dying. Use the resources at Death over Dinner to gather with friends and family for these conversations. Also have meaningful conversations, and consider recording them, like I did with my father, with the important people in your lives. Finally, enjoy the journey, cherish the dash between the years from when you were born and when you will die and continually ask yourself the question “What is it you want to do with your one wild and precious life?”
This Episode is dedicated byDonna Helete Donna Helete thrives in the realm of human connection. She’s a regenerative grief coach, bereavement counselor, relationship tender, mentor, educator, and community builder with experience in non-profit leadership. She holds space for conversations around grief, love, life, and death. She walks a path toward elderhood, bringing with her real life credentials which include the death of her husband of 28 years in September 2015. Through her experience, she emphasizes the regenerative nature of grief, which allows us to be renewed again and again. To learn more about her work, visit donnahelete.com and learn about her one on one sessions and workshop offerings.
Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.
Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, Engaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C).
This Father’s Day 2021, many of us are re-emerging and with so much change, I find myself wanting to return to words of wisdom that can ground me during this time of transition.
Rather than recording a new episode with a father this year, I’m putting together an episode to highlight my favorite insights from fathers I’ve interviewed since the podcast began. So stay tuned for that episode coming out soon.
In the meantime, I wanted to re-release this full interview with my very own father, David Lieberman, with a dedication by my son Ryan, whose voice no longer sounds anything like this. Though so much has changed, the words from the dedication and the interview itself feel as true and powerful as ever.
Sending love to my own Dad, father in law and husband this Father’s Day and wishes for all of you to discover or rediscover connection and inspiration from the fathers and father figures in your life.
Much appreciation,
P.S. Know someone who would love this conversation? Pay this forward to a friend who may be interested.
Original Show Notes – 2018
Love of Family and Pursuing our Fate ~A Father’s Day Special~ with David Lieberman
What an honor it is to bring you this episode with my own father as one of two I’m having with men on the podcast this month in honor of Father’s Day.
Two things sparked my interest in having my father on the show now…first, a desire to feel more connected to my grandmother Molla, my father’s mother, who passed away years before I was born from pancreatic cancer. I wanted to hear from my Dad about his experience of his mother, how she shaped him, and the ways he notices her spirit living on in us today.
Related to this, I recently went to a workshop to learn about uncovering our family ancestry and at that workshop they discussed the power of oral histories. My Dad is a storyteller and I wanted to use this amazing platform to capture his stories and life lessons, for me, for my children and the Mother’s Quest Community.
The episode is an exploration of my father’s E.P.I.C. life, how his mother’s passion as a voice and elocution teacher shaped him into the powerful speaker and human being he is today, the moment he first saw my mom when she was just 11 years old, how he built a career and a family, and a love of golf to help him cope with the effects of Type 1 Diabetes. And, how he views love of family and the pursuit of fate as a theme that runs through it all.
This episode’s dedication was shared by Vanessa Couto, an astrologist who considers fate and what’s written “in the stars” for us as part of her exploration and practice. Vanessa honored her father Guido with this dedication and reflected on the ways that fate, legacy, and character help us live a life of purpose.
I loved reflecting on these same elements of my father’s life in this conversation. I wasn’t surprised that there were moments that made my Dad and I laugh and cry during along the way. But, I was surprised by the insights that emerged…about the ways in which my grandmother and my father’s qualities live in me. I’ve known I’m much like my mother, but it wasn’t until the end of this conversation that I realized that the “seeker” in me, the one who is always on a quest, comes from my father.
My Dad believes that fate play a role in all of our lives, but that we must actively pursue it to fully realize it. Our challenge this month is to reflect on the moments in our lives when we chose to pursue our fate and what happened as a result. Also, to notice and seize the new opportunities and possibilities that call us to take action today in our E.P.I.C. lives.
In honor of Father’s Day, I’d like to add one more challenge that we didn’t discuss in the interview but came to me as I wrote this introduction. Seek out the father or father figures in your life to ask them about and record the stories, lessons and insights they have to pass along to this and future generations.
I promise you’ll learn something powerful about yourself and how to more fully live your E.P.I.C. life.
**Stick around till the end for some light and funny bloopers from the interview.
My father’s view on fate and how it has been a thread weaving through his whole E.P.I.C. life
The ways my grandmother shaped my father and the thing she said to him that sealed his fate for a life he loved in California
How fate brought my father and mother together, from his first site of her receiving a drama lesson from his mother, to summers as children and teens in a bungalow colony, to 50 plus years of marriage.
Where the seeds for his playful nature and love for his children and grandchildren were planted early in his life
How he pursued a career in a business he built, the people he met and helped along the way, and the importance of being a person of integrity
The impact of Type 1 Diabetes and stress on his life and how his love of golf became his remedy
Some funny stories of crazy things that happened to him, several involving the Wall Street Journal, and one that you may want to turn the volume down on if your children are listening with you.
The favorite toasts passed down to him by his mother
This Week’s Challenge:
There are three challenges this week:
One from me, to look back on our lives, notice the moments when we chose to seek our fate, the impact that has had on us, and to share it with our family members
One from my father to continue to seek out our fate, taking action on opportunities even when we’re not certain what might come from it
And one that emerged from my son Ryan, to share this episode with the fathers or father figures in your life, let them know how you appreciate them, and explore and record their stories and lessons learned.
Other Special Episodes with the People in My Life:
If you’d like to make a contribution to Mother’s Quest to support Season Four of the Podcast and/or help provide coaching scholarships for mothers, follow this link to make a contribution.
If you would like to “dedicate” an upcoming episode to a special mother in your life, email me at julie@mothersquest.com
Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.
Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, Engaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C).
I’m honored to share this special Father’s Day Episode with a devoted father, successful entrepreneur and fellow podcaster who has become a friend, Darius Hicks.
Known as “Vince” on the acclaimed While Black Podcast, Darius channels his rage at the injustices Black people experience in our country by focusing it on empowering, educating, and inspiring African Americans to go and grow. While Black tells stories by, from, and for African Americans and pairs those stories with expert and credible guests who can communicate wisdom and success strategies to help the Black listeners achieve, accomplish, and overcome.
In this conversation, Darius had me riveted, inspired and often in tears as we explored his epic life quest, his transformative moments as a father, how his work through While Black is meeting this moment and movement in our country, and the unique role that mothers, fathers and our younger generation all have to play in making change.
To honor this episode, I want to share a statement of shared commitment from an effort called Podcasters for Justice that aligns with so much of the messages Darius and I explore here together:
“We are podcasters united to condemn the tragic murders of George Floyd and Breonna Taylor and many many others at the hands of police. This is a continuation of the systemic racism pervasive in our country since its inception and we are committed to standing against racism in all its forms.
We believe that to be silent is to be complicit. We believe that Black lives matter. We believe that Black lives are more important than property. We believe that we have a responsibility to use our platforms to speak out against this injustice whenever and wherever we are witness to it. In creating digital media we have built audiences that return week after week to hear our voices and we will use our voices to speak against anti-blackness and police brutality.”
I invite you to join me in donating to one of the efforts that Podcasters for Justice identified which you can find below in the show notes, to listen to and amplify this episode with Darius, and to follow each of Darius’ powerful calls to action, stepping into kinetic partnership that will move us forward and help us all get free, together.
Much appreciation,
P.S. Know someone who would love this conversation? Pay this forward to a friend who may be interested.
This Episode is Dedicated by: Herve Clermont
Herve Clermont is an actor, voice over artist, Host, and was a National brand ambassador for Remy Martin for over 8 years. He discovered his passion for acting at Georgetown University, where he was in school as a pre-med major, and needed to fulfill electives.
He is the son of a proud Haitian Doctor and nurse, he always joked he “could play one.” He began his professional acting career in 2000 with a contract Role on One Life To Live, and has co-starred and guest starred on various prime time shows: Law & Order, CSI Miami, Cane, 24, Criminal Minds, Scandal, Guys with Kids, New Girl, The Mick, NCIS, NCIS LA, Dice, Veronica Mars, Mr Iglesias, and many others.
Herve has been recurring on John Singleton’s Snowfall the last 3 seasons, before landing a series cast member on Tyler Perry’s Ruthless. His voice-over career includes announcing at celebrity fund-raisers, branding and promotional videos, industrials and promotional TV and radio commercials, including ones for Beyonce, an international Jazz festival, and currently is the voice behind Cintas and on camera.
Herve’s hosting experience includes live events with BMW, VH-l, Harmon/ Kardon and Remy Martin. He has also worked on a pilot in front of the camera as a Studio host in the entertainment industry, interviewing celebrities and keeping the audience up-to-date with the latest entertainment news.
Instagram @Plantinghopela – to learn about Herve’s wife’s venture that creates beautiful plants with contributions supporting the Foundation in Haiti and charitable efforts in LA.
The universal language and common connection among mothers of all races and how Darius and I both believe mothers will be critical to making change
Darius’ quest to be authentically who he is as a 6’4, 300-pound dark-skinned Black man. How he has struggled to stand tall and shine while also consciously shrinking because people’s first reaction to him is fear
The question about fatherhood Darius asks himself all the time…”How do I raise fearless children when I am a fearful parent?”
A heartbreaking but powerful “epic snapshot moment” with his son that made Darius realize his words were getting through to him and that his son would be part of making change
How those committed to anti-racism and new to this can begin and the reason why Darius seeks “partnership” over saviorism or “help”
The three-fold challenge Darius gave us, including the specific movies that Darius thinks we should all watch to shift our understanding and perspective
How we all need each other to get free
This Week’s Challenge:
Darius gave us a threefold challenge: 1) There is bias inside all of us. We all have it. Try our very best to recognize when our unconscious bias fires. Try to pay attention every time we see or meet a Black person…if our initial intent is to walk in the other direction, stop for a moment and ask yourself why?
2) Meet someone new and be the first one to say hello and to really see the humanity in them. 3) Be more intentional in our actions and in whatever media we digest so that we are aware of what’s really happening and what others are really going through. Specifically, watch the movies American Son, 13th, and When They See Us (all linked below.)
Learn More About Darius Hicks
Darius has always displayed an entrepreneurial and activist spirit. Since his youth he has dedicated his time to those around him in hopes of bettering them while he better himself. It began by volunteering as a camp counselor from middle school through high school, and grew via mentorship and tutoring in college all the way to his membership role in the 100 Black Men and as an advocate for African Americans through his work on the While Black Podcast. Vince believes wholeheartedly the James Baldwin quote “To be Negro in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be a rage almost all the time”. However, he chooses to channel that rage into a place that allows him to change the narrative on black folks while he helps to empower those same black folks.
Earning his undergraduate degree in Civil Engineering from Southern University A&M in Baton Rouge LA (1999) and his MBA from Queens University in Charlotte NC (2005), Vince has gained valuable experience in multiple industries.
He has excelled in multiple industries and enjoyed a career spanning 20+ years with opportunities in Engineering, Consumer packaged goods, Corporate retail giants, and now the Social/tech industry.
In addition, he is a successful entrepreneur and founder of Aveo Big and Tall Golf Apparel which rose to become the #1 big and tall golf apparel offering in Golfsmith stores and was distributed nationally and internationally via various outlets including but not limited to Dicks Sporting Good, GolfSmith, and Golf Galaxy. He has since sold the rights to the Aveo name and divested from the company.
However, he has altered his focus by aligning his passions with his promise and ensuring his time is invested accordingly as he focuses on improving the black world and the global community through and with black people. His latest endeavor is laser focused on impacting and improving the people around him. Specifically, he is the creator and co-host of the While Black Podcast a podcast focused on empowering, educating, and inspiring African Americans to go and grow. While Black tells stories by, from, and for African Americans and pairs those stories with expert and credible guests who can communicate wisdom and success strategies helping us to achieve, accomplish, and overcome.
At the time I’m releasing this episode, during the COVID-19 global pandemic, so many of us are seeking ways to connect with one another, even while needing to stay physically apart. If you identify with being a mother on a quest and you’re not yet a member of the free private Mother’s Quest Facebook Group, I invite you to join us for opportunities to learn together, to share what we have to offer one another and where we need support, and to find ways to make meaning of all we’re going through right now. Visit www.motherquest.com/community to join and I’d be honored to welcome you in.
Season Five of the Mother’s Podcast is Under Way! – Help us Spread the Word
If you enjoy the Mother’s Quest Podcast, we’d love your support in sharing this or another favorite episode with a mother you think would appreciate it too!
Another way to help spread the word is to leave a review at Apple Podcasts. Instructions for leaving a review are here: How to leave a rating or review for a podcast from your iPhone or iPad
On your iOS mobile device, launch Apple’s Podcast app.
Tap the Search tab in the lower right corner of the screen.
Enter the name of the podcast you want to rate or review. …
Tap the Reviews tab, then tap “Write a Review” at the bottom of the screen.
Acknowledgments:
A big THANK YOU to our “patrons” for helping to bring these conversations to myself and other mothers through financial and/or in-kind support:
Herve Clermont Samantha Arsenault Vickie Giambra Casey O’Roarty of Joyful Courage Kathie Moehlig or TransFamily Support Services
Anne Ferguson of MamaFuel On the Move and etsuko Kubo Kate Amoo-Gottfried Nicole Lee Olivia Parr-Rud “Vince” of the While Black Podcast Sara Brannin-Mooser Lindsay Pera Julie Castro Abrams Alexia Vernon Brooke Markevicius Democracy Clothing Michael Skolnik Helgi Maki Kari Azuma Tamara Sobomehin Katie Krimitsos Carrie Caulfield Arick Rachel Rosen Chandra Brooks Jen Simon Monisha Vasa Celia Ward-Wallace Vanessa Couto Desiree Adaway Rachel Steinman Katie Hanus Denise Barreto Sage B. Hobbs Samantha Nolan-Smith Jody Smith Emily Cretella Collette Flanagan Titilayo Tinubu Ali Carly Magnus Hurt Lizzy Russinko Suzanne Brown Mara Berns Langer Mallory Schlabach Katharine Earhart Jessica Kupferman Jen Jenkins Dohner Genese Harris Tonya Rineer Liane Louie-Badua Cristin Downs Erin Kendall Niko Osoteo Erik Newton Claire Fry Divya Silbermann Rachel Winter Caren and Debbie Lieberman Cameron Miranda Fran and David Lieberman Debbie and Alan Goore The Sustainable Living Podcast Samantha Arsenault
Support the Podcast
If you’d like to make a contribution to Mother’s Quest to support Season Four of the Podcast and/or help provide coaching scholarships for mothers, follow this link to make a contribution.
If you would like to “dedicate” an upcoming episode to a special mother in your life, email me at julie@mothersquest.com
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Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.
Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, Engaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C).
What a joy and honor it was to hold space for reflective conversation with two change-making women who have an epic friendship that has spanned more than three decades, Pamela Slim and Desiree Lynn Adaway.
The two met on a hill in Northern California on the first day of college at the age of 18 and have been best friends ever since. From completely different lived experiences, Desiree is a black woman from the south side of Chicago, and Pamela a white woman from Marin in the San Francisco Bay Area, they unite around common interests and connections that transcend while never forgetting their differences. They love each other’s families fiercely and fight in their own unique ways and in their own communities for inclusion, equity and justice.
Mother to two grown daughters, Desiree is also a consultant, trainer, coach and speaker working to build resilient, equitable, and inclusive organizations. Holding a vision for people’s lives, workplaces and communities until they can hold it for themselves, she has committed over 20 years to creating, leading and managing international, multicultural teams through major organizational changes in over 40 countries. She also teaches and advocates powerfully in the online space and in a course I took from her and her partners called Diversity is an Asset.
Pamela is an award-winning author, community builder, consultant, speaker, and small business strategist. Alongside being a step mother to an adult son and raising her two teenagers, she’s also the founder of The Main Street Learning Lab in downtown Mesa, where she works to increase the effectiveness, equity, and visibility of small business owners from marginalized communities including women, people of color, and the LGBTQ community, and to connect these business owners with the rapidly growing opportunities in Mesa, the Phoenix metro area, and beyond.
Being deeply seen and deeply understood is a theme that runs through this conversation, as we explore the ways that Desiree and Pamela experience the epic guideposts in their lives and in their friendship.
I felt like the entire conversation was a love letter to friendship and a call to action to risk being known, knowing others, expanding our perspectives and championing diversity. I hope you’ll listen with an open heart and leave this conversation as I did, committed to the specific challenges that Pamela and Desiree offered us and inspired to show up every day as a better ally and a better friend.
Much appreciation,
P.S. Know someone who would love this conversation? Click forward now to pay this forward to a friend who may be interested.
This Episode is Dedicated by: Nicole Lee
Nicole Lee is the founder of Inclusive Life™ and mom to Madison and Zindzi. She is also the co-founder of the Lee Bayard Group LLC and Black Movement-Law Project (BMLP).
Nicole Lee is a diversity, equity and inclusion expert, leadership coach, nationally recognized speaker and strategist who regularly consults with nonprofits, schools, businesses, and political and social movements to improve their climate for themselves and all those that they serve.
Nicole is a prolific speaker and commentator who has regularly appeared on CNN, MSNBC, NPR, and BBC. She has been recognized for her outstanding contributions in the private and public sectors through numerous awards, including Congressional Black Caucus, Running Starts “Women to Watch”, Black Women’s Roundtable TrailBlazer and Global Leadership and the National Newspapers Publishers Association’s Press Champion Award.
Nicole is also an attorney and nonprofit leader, having formerly served as the first female President of TransAfrica, the nation’s premier African American foreign affairs organization. She, along with civil and labor rights icon Bill Lucy, was the coordinator of the Life, Legacy and Values of Nelson Mandela, a six-month national celebration of the life of Nelson Mandela and his US Memorial Service at the National Cathedral. She is a founder of the BMLP, a legal organization affiliated with the Movement for Black Lives.
The beautiful birthday letter Pamela wrote to Desiree and posted on Facebook that inspired me to record this episode
Pam and Desiree’s life before they became best friends, how they found each other and how they’ve shaped each other’s lives since
What the bracelet Desiree wears every day says and how it connects to her motherhood, her work, and her life journey
How I learned from Desiree that allyship is a daily commitment and how that connects to how Desiree and Pamela approach their friendship
What it looks like to be in right relationship
What Desiree means when she says “Pam never remembers that I’m black and she never forgets that I’m black.”
The “Sister Resister” card Desiree pulled from her deck that connected perfectly to this conversation
The epic snapshot moment of Pam’s with her own daughter that Desiree says exemplified Pam’s self-awareness and lack of ego
Dismantling and examining cultural norms and creating our own definition of culture
Pamela’s and Desiree’s challenges for us to expand our own awareness and perspective of diversity by reading books only of authors of color for 3 or 6 months (you choose!) and to notice in our spaces and places who is and isn’t being represented
For this episode, Pam and Desiree challenge us to take 3 to 6 months of reading books that are from people of color, if you’re a dominant identity or if you’re white. While you’re at it, you’ll notice how your perspective and view of the world around you will change.
Another challenge… when you are in any situation, school, work, office, ask yourself “who is here?”, “who’s not here?”, and “why aren’t they here?”. Answering these questions will raise your level of awareness, and help you bridge the gap that exists in the areas where we are not seeing diverse representation.
Learn More About Desiree:
Desiree is a seasoned nonprofit consultant and facilitator. All of her presentations have a mix of thought-provoking content presented with humor and wit. When she teaches, she makes a point to connect with every person and create a safe space for their growth. She is known by staff, senior leadership, peers, and partners as being great at open, honest, and productive conversations. She is not afraid of addressing anything that gets in the way of great work. Her style is positive, approachable, engaging, service-oriented and audience-centered.
Pamela Slim is an award-winning author, community builder, consultant, speaker, and small business strategist. She is the founder of The Main Street Learning Lab in downtown Mesa, where she works with business owners to remove obstacles to small business success and test and try new business ideas.
She is best known for her book Escape from Cubicle Nation (named Best Small Business and Entrepreneur book of 2009 from 800 CEO Read) along with her follow up book Body of Work. Both were published by Penguin/Portfolio.
Pam is frequently quoted as an expert in publications such as BusinessWeek, The New York Times, Money Magazine and Psychology Today. Pam lives in Mesa, Arizona.
As this episode is released, we are just days away from the two year anniversary of the Charlottesville Rally. I remember waking to the news the next day and deciding I had a responsibility to use my voice and the platform I’m building with the Mother’s Quest Podcast to pursue social justice. Many said “yes” alongside me and The Women Podcasters in Solidarity Initiative was born.
First season episodes, with a focus on anti-racism and police brutality, are up at www.womenpodcastersinsolidarity.com, and episodes I recorded for our second season, on the intersectional impact of gun violence, are assembled on the latest Mother’s Quest Blog.
Last weekend’s events, two mass shootings within 24 hours, blasted our consciousness with the work still ahead and urgency to fight gun violence and also the racism tied to these events. I hope you’ll follow the links in the show notes to the episodes recorded and that they might shine some light on a path forward. Because, as my guest on this episode’s podcast Desiree says, we only get free together.
Want More Reflection in Your Life? Book A Discovery Call
Some key themes that emerge from this conversation with Amy Simpkins, is the power of reflection and the power of being seen. These are elements that I bring, not only to every podcast interview, but to my one-one-one coaching and Mother’s Quest Circle facilitation. If you’re seeking more space for pause and reflection in your life, I encourage you to reach out to me for a discovery call to learn how we might work together. Visit mothersquest.as.me/discoverysession to schedule a time to talk.
⚡️Have you been feeling a nudge to say “yes” to create your Mother’s Quest Manifesto? The official challenge and giveaway may be over, but the invitation and content is always there for you to create your #oneminutemommanifesto
Here are some easy steps you can follow…
👉 Join the Mother’s Quest Facebook Group www.mothersquest.com/community to find the “unit” for the Manifesto Challenge’s reflective prompts and live videos. It’s all waiting for you!
👉 Follow along with the “unit” at your own pace. Share your reflections along the way in the comments. Let us cheer you on!
👉 Give yourself some quiet time to create your own #oneminutemommanifesto in whatever way feels good…writing, art, photos, song. It can be simple and quick. Don’t overthink it. What matters most, as a guiding light, for how you want to live your life at this stage of raising your children?
👉 Share your #oneminutemommanifesto on social media with the hashtag. Tag me if you can to make sure I’ve seen it. Consider nominating a friend who would benefit.
–Join us, share or tag a friend, or comment on how the #oneminutemommanifesto has helped you if you’ve already created yours.–
Would LOVE for more of you to join us in claiming, or reclaiming, HOW you want to live your life ✨🙌
Did you catch the Father’s Day Special?
Listen to these two amazing fathers who were on the show here:
A big THANK YOU to our “patrons” for helping to bring these conversations to myself and other mothers through financial and/or in-kind support:
Nicole Lee
Olivia Parr-Rud “Vince” of the While Black Podcast Sara Brannin-Mooser Lindsay Pera Julie Castro Abrams Alexia Vernon Brooke Markevicius Democracy Clothing Michael Skolnik Helgi Maki Kari Azuma Tamara Sobomehin Katie Krimitsos Carrie Caulfield Arick Rachel Rosen Chandra Brooks Jen Simon Monisha Vasa Celia Ward-Wallace Vanessa Couto Desiree Adaway Rachel Steinman Katie Hanus Denise Barreto Sage B. Hobbs Samantha Nolan-Smith Jody Smith Emily Cretella Collette Flanagan Titilayo Tinubu Ali Carly Magnus Hurt Lizzy Russinko Suzanne Brown Mara Berns Langer Mallory Schlabach Katharine Earhart Jessica Kupferman Jen Jenkins Dohner Genese Harris Tonya Rineer Liane Louie-Badua Cristin Downs Erin Kendall Niko Osoteo Erik Newton Claire Fry Divya Silbermann Rachel Winter Caren and Debbie Lieberman Cameron Miranda Fran and David Lieberman Debbie and Alan Goore The Sustainable Living Podcast
Support the Podcast
If you’d like to make a contribution to Mother’s Quest to support Season Three of the Podcast and/or help provide coaching scholarships for mothers, follow this link to make a contribution.
If you would like to “dedicate” an upcoming episode to a special mother in your life, email me at julie@mothersquest.com
Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.
Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, Engaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C).
I’m honored to bring this special episode of the Mother’s Quest Podcast to you with mother, activist, writer, co-founder of the Trayvon Martin Foundation and an inspiration to so many, Sybrina Fulton.
The episode is the last in a series I’ve recorded for the Women Podcasters in Solidarity Initiative on the subject of gun safety and the intersectional impact of gun violence on our communities.
Unfortunately, Sybrina deeply knows the grief that comes in the wake of gun violence. But, after the deadly 2012 shooting of her beloved son, Trayvon Benjamin Martin, she felt compelled to rise up, literally pushing herself to get out of her bed, becoming the voice for her son and embarking on a journey to bring awareness to senseless gun violence and racial profiling.
In 2016, Sybrina rallied to the forefront at the Democratic National Convention with a group of African American trailblazing women, connected by tragedy, who became known as “Mothers of the Movement” for the “Black Lives Matter” Movement the death of their children sparked.
She didn’t stop there. In 2017, Sybrina co-authored her first book, Rest in Power, The Enduring Life of Trayvon Martin, a memoir recounting the death of her son, which became the subject of a docu-series that debuted this year, Rest in Power: The Trayvon Martin Story, produced by hip-hop mogul Shawn “Jay-Z” Carter.
This intimate conversation, over a year in the making, was a unique opportunity to delve into Sybrina’s own journey, how the E.P.I.C. guideposts show up in her life and in her activism, and to hear her powerful call to action to invest in mothers, by reaching out to mothers grieving in our own communities and by contributing to her “Circle of Mothers,” a labor of love that came to her in her dreams.
I’m grateful to activist Michael Skolnik, who dedicated this episode, for connecting me to Sybrina and for inviting us to spread this conversation far and wide and direct resources to help mothers turn their grief into healing and advocacy, following Sybrina’s powerful example.
It costs $1500 to sponsor a grieving mother to attend Circle of Mothers. Michael and I have each pledged the first $3,000 to a GoFundMe campaign, each of us contributing $1500 to help a mother who otherwise wouldn’t be able to attend. I hope you’ll open your hearts and minds to Sybrina’s story, visit www.mothersquest.com/circleofmothers and join us in contributing to her mission.
Much appreciation,
P.S. Know someone who you think would appreciate this special episode? Share this conversation!
This Episode is Dedicated by: Michael Skolnik
Michael Skolnik was recently profiled in the NY Times and identified as “the man you go to if you want to leverage the power of celebrity and the reach of digital media to soften the ground for social change.” But, besides all of that, he is most proud to be the father of Mateo Ali, a rambunctious five year old.
He is the co-founder and partner of The Soze Agency, a social impact agency that partners with companies, non-profits, foundations and movements to create campaigns that uplift compassion, authenticity and equity.
He is a respected leader in the new social justice movement, and has helped ignite conversations around America’s relationship with race, the deaths of Trayvon Martin, Mike Brown and Eric Garner, and the Obama and Trump presidencies.
He is a prolific voice on social media with more than 350,000 followers, and a regular commentator on outlets such as CNN, MSNBC and Fox News.
Michael serves on the Board of Directors for Rock The Vote, The Trayvon Martin Foundation, Policy Link, The Gathering For Justice and The Young Partners Board of The Public Theater.
What Sybrina wishes everyone would know about approaching a conversation with a mother who has lost a child.
My 14 year old son’s question to Sybrina about what it feels like when your calling and the powerful work you’re doing is sparked by a tremendous loss.
Why we need systemic and cultural change, and more awareness-raising conversations, to keep young people of color safe from racial profiling.
The tragic death of Chinedu Okobi, an unarmed young black man who was tasered to death by San Mateo County deputies, just 20 minutes from my own home.
The importance for grieving mothers to remember the things that they used to love and what Sybrina’s joyful outlet is
The Circle of Mothers and how the idea to create it came to Sybrina in a dream.
Sybrina’s challenge for all of us to open our hearts and to reach out to mothers, across differences, who have lost their child to let them know we care.
Why investing in mothers is the most powerful lever to impact gun control.
For this week’s challenge, Sybrina asks us to reach out to a mother who has lost a child and be a support to them. Take them out, let them know you are here, organize something for a group. Let them know that they are not alone.
You can also show your support, and invest in the healing of mothers who can lead the way forward, by contributing directly to the GoFundMe campaign and sponsor mothers to attend this year’s Circle of Mothers event. We have a goal to raise $15,000 and send 10 mothers, at $1,500 per person, who wouldn’t otherwise be able to attend.
Special thanks to Alaura Weaver of WordWeaver Freelance for helping with the copy for the GoFundMe page.
Learn More About Sybrina Fulton:
After the death of her beloved son, Trayvon Benjamin Martin, in February 2012, Sybrina Fulton was charged with a new mission. A desire to transform family tragedy into social change allowed her to establish the Trayvon Martin Foundation in March 2012.
As Fulton traverses the globe, she passionately embarks on a journey designed to bring awareness to senseless gun violence and serves as an advocate to families, the catalyst for her dream project, the “Circle of Mothers.” Winning the national support of president-elect Hillary Clinton, Fulton rallied to the forefront in 2016 at the Democratic National Convention with a cadre of African American trailblazing women known as “Mothers of the Movement.” The women, connected by tragedy, are the inspiration behind the “Black Lives Matter.”
In 2017, Fulton co-authored her first book, Rest in Power, The Enduring Life of Trayvon Martin, a memoir recounting the death of her son, and the subject of a six-part docuseries, Rest in Power: The Trayvon Martin Story, produced by hip-hop mogul Shawn “Jay-Z” Carter for Paramount Network and BET (July 2018).
Bestowed with many distinguished awards, Sybrina Fulton has represented the United States at the United Nations in Geneva, Switzerland, to discuss racial discrimination; the National Urban League, Black Lives Matter, Rainbow PUSH Coalition, The Triumph Awards (2016), Essence Festival & Conference (2017, 2018), and was selected as the White House’s guest of honor for the unveiling of former President Barak Obama’s initiative, “My Brother’s Keeper.” Fulton is also one of the 2018 recipients of VH1’s Trailblazer Honor Award.
A Miami native and graduate of Florida Memorial University, Sybrina Fulton, along with her son, Jahvaris, are on a mission to build better, safer communities. She is a proud member of the Miami Alumnae Chapter of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc. and the Metropolitan Dade County Section of the National Council of Negro Women, Inc.
She created the Circle of Mothers as a way to empower women. The purpose of the Circle of Mothers is to bring together mothers who have lost children or family members to senseless gun violence for the purpose of healing, empowerment, and fellowship towards the larger aim of community building.
As of December of 2018, 644 children and 2,729 teens have been killed by gun violence in the US this year. If you feel pain at the loss of so many young lives full of promise, imagine the devastating grief experienced by the mothers they’ve left behind.
On May 16, 2014, Sybrina embarked on a powerful call to action to support and invest in mothers, by reaching out to mothers grieving in our communities. The Circle of Mothers, an annual retreat for women who have lost a child to senseless gun violence, was born.
It costs $1,500 to sponsor a mother who would otherwise not be able to participate in Circle of Mothers. Activist Michael Skolnik and I have pledged the first $3,000 of this $15,000 campaign, 2 toward our goal of 10 women we hope to send.
I pray that one day we won’t need The Circle of Mothers, because we’ve brought an end to gun violence in the US and no more mothers will have to grieve the theft of their children’s lives.
Until then, I hope you’ll open your hearts and minds to Sybrina’s story, lift up grieving mothers who seek healing, and invest in them to lead the way forward.
Tragically, I have now lost count of the number of mass shootings have taken place just in the time since the Women Podcasters in Solidarity selected “gun safety” as the issue we want to shine a light on this season.
Grateful to partner with Cristin Marie and Elsie Escobar on bringing this season of the Initiative to life. It is my deepest hope that through the power of podcasting, the episodes we will record, the conversations we will share with our listeners, and the dollars we will collectively raise toward gun safety causes, will save lives.
Please take a look at Cristin’s post here and say “yes” to the Initiative yourself or help spread the word to reach other podcasters who would want to join.
Mother’s Quest Circle
If you’re on a quest to live an E.P.I.C. life, but you’ve been feeling challenged, isolated, or unsure of the path ahead, the Virtual Mother’s Quest Circle may be the source of connection you’re looking for.
The Mother’s Quest Circle provides inspiration, coaching and community for an intimate group of no more than 8 women who are ready to say “yes” to:
✨Reflect together, in a community of like-minded mothers, on what matters most ✨To consciously live their version (not someone else’s) of an E.P.I.C. life ✨To take bold action toward one of the E.P.I.C. life guideposts before the end of the sessions ✨To hold space for sharing, coaching, and championing one another so we are “in community” on our journey
If you’re looking to start the year strong, the Circle is a great way to make an investment in yourself and what matters most to you. Apply here to add your name to the wait list.
A big THANK YOU to our “patrons” for helping to bring these conversations to myself and other mothers through financial and/or in-kind support:
Michael Skolnik Helgi Maki Kari Azuma Tamara Sobomehin Katie Krimitsos Carrie Caulfield Arick Rachel Rosen Chandra Brooks Jen Simon Monisha Vasa Celia Ward-Wallace Vanessa Couto Desiree Adaway Rachel Steinman Katie Hanus Denise Barreto Sage B. Hobbs Samantha Nolan-Smith Jody Smith Emily Cretella Collette Flanagan Titilayo Tinubu Ali Carly Magnus Hurt Lizzy Russinko Suzanne Brown Mara Berns Langer Mallory Schlabach Katharine Earhart Jessica Kupferman Jen Jenkins Dohner Genese Harris Tonya Rineer Liane Louie-Badua Cristin Downs Erin Kendall Niko Osoteo Erik Newton Claire Fry Divya Silbermann Rachel Winter Caren and Debbie Lieberman Cameron Miranda Fran and David Lieberman Debbie and Alan Goore The Sustainable Living Podcast
Support the Podcast
If you’d like to make a contribution to Mother’s Quest to support Season Three of the Podcast and/or help provide coaching scholarships for mothers, follow this link to make a contribution.
If you would like to “dedicate” an upcoming episode to a special mother in your life, email me at julie@mothersquest.com
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Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.
Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, Engaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C).
It’s a joy and honor to bring this final episode of Season Two, Episode #34, with my own mother Fran Lieberman and her dear friend Sandy Klasky, who are celebrating their book club’s 50th anniversary.
I couldn’t think of a more special way to close this season then reflecting with two women, who are mothers and grandmothers, on the lessons of their E.P.I.C. lives across decades, how they’ve passed on values of social justice to their children and grandchildren, the power of friendship, and of shared experiences, like reading books together, to build community.
In this episode, we talk about what shaped my mother and Sandy as they emerged from the stable years of the 1940’s and 1950’s into the tumultuous times of the 1960’s and 1970’s, the ways they sought to have impact beyond their family as women when there were fewer opportunities open to them, how they invested in their own interests and friendships while raising their children, and looking back now, the wisdom and advice they would offer to their younger selves.
The 50th anniversary of their book club, and how it’s been an important constant in their lives, is a thread we weave throughout the episode and the challenge they offer us is to read books that they felt made a profound impact on them. They share the reason behind the success and longevity of their book club and friendship and also some snapshot moments from across the years that they will always remember.
Stay through to the end for a funny blooper reel capturing some behind the scenes moments of what it took to persevere through the challenges to record the podcast episode. It was a testament to the power of what’s possible with today’s technology and to holding a growth mindset no matter what your age.
I loved the perspective and inspiration that shines through this unique conversation on the podcast and I hope you will too. So, get comfortable, pour yourself a cup of tea or coffee, or maybe a glass of wine, and settle into the wisdom from these two life-long friends.
My mother and Sandy’s social justice roots, one forged as a student in New York where she was exposed to different cultures, religions, and races and one that grew from experiences of living in a segregated city of Detroit
The trauma of the 1960’s and 1970’s, including the deaths of leaders like John F. Kennedy and Martin Luther King, the Civil Rights Movement and the Vietnam War, and how our country has risen before from tumultuous times
The multigenerational influence Sandy and my mother have had on their children and grandchildren, especially as a result of sharing values and experiences around politics and social justice and how Sandy’s daughter, Stephanie Klasky-Gamer, was featured in LA Magazine for her leadership as President and CEO of LA Family Housing.
The story of how the book club got started with women who were focused on raising their children and sought connection and intellectual stimulation. Also, what has enabled the club to endure through so many years.
The difference in the way they had to do research for their book club discussions in the past, going to the library and photocopying materials vs. now that we have the internet.
Snapshot book club moments my mother and Sandy will always remember, like coming together on 9/11 and when their dear friend, and founder of the club, Judy Duroff passed away.
How Sandy and I both identify with having had a mid-life Renaissance and the importance of following your heart to create your E.P.I.C. life.
The advice Fran and Sandy would give to their younger selves.
The books from their book club that made a lasting impact on them.
Zoom – the technology we used to record our conversation
This Week’s Challenge:
Read the books Room by Emma Donoghue and The Things They Carried by Tim O’Brien
Announcements:
A Podcast Break Until February – Stay in Touch!
This episode marks the end of Season Two and the start of some time off from podcasting until Season Three begins in February. If you haven’t already, be sure to subscribe and join the email list so you’ll get updates when Season Three begins. And if you want to stay connected through the break, join the Mother’s Quest Facebook group where I’ll continue to share resources, favorite episodes from past seasons, and personal reflections.
Help Us Celebrate Mother’s Quest’s First Birthday
A year ago on December 1st, I launched the Mother’s Quest Podcast as a birthday present to myself. It’s hard to believe that another personal birthday and the first birthday of the podcast have arrived.
I’d love to celebrate by highlighting your stories and how the podcast or Mother’s Quest Community has helped you to live your E.P.I.C. life. Go to mothersquest.com and use the speakpipe tool to leave me a 1-2 minute message for a chance to be featured in a special E.P.I.C. Guideposts Episode.
Everyone who submits will also be entered into a drawing for a free signature coaching session from me and some other prizes from other amazing moms in the Mother’s Quest Community. Can’t wait to hear your stories and celebrate with you.
Virtual Mother’s Quest Circle Pilot
You’re a mindful mother. And being present for your children in these years when you’re raising them is your highest priority. You’re also committed to making a positive impact in the world, something that feels even more important with all the challenges we currently face.
If the description above sounds like you, the Virtual Mother’s Quest Circle Pilot, may be right for you. Or, if you live in the S.F. Bay Area, you can participate in an in-person circle that starts on December 16th.
This signature offering provides inspiration, coaching and community to spark your E.P.I.C. life with intimate virtual reflective sessions over four months.
If you haven’t yet visited the website, head over to www.mothersquest.comto explore some of the ways you can get more connected. At the site, you can sign up for our email list (to get show notes delivered to your inbox and our new “Mothers on a Quest” features), click the link to join the Facebook group and press record to leave a voice message for me. You can also download the FREE Live Your E.P.I.C. Life Planning and Reflection Sheets.
Acknowledgements:
A big THANK YOU to our “patrons” for helping to bring these conversations to myself and other mothers through financial and/or in-kind support:
Collette Flanagan, founder of Mothers Against Police Brutality
Titilayo Tinubu Ali of Own Your Expertise
Carly Magnus Hurt
Lizzy Russinko of This (Un)Scripted Life
Suzanne Brown, author of Mompowerment
Mara Berns Langer
Mallory Schlabach of Marketing Magic for Entrepreneurs
Katharine Earhart of Alesco Advisors
Jessica Kupferman of She Podcasts
Resistance Artist Jen Jenkins Dohner
Genese Harris
Tonya Rineer, founder of The Profit Party
Liane Louie-Badua
Cristin Downs of the Notable Woman Podcast
Erin Kendall of Fit Mom Go
Niko Osoteo of Bear Beat Productions
Erik Newton of The Together Show
Claire Fry
Divya Silbermann
Rachel Winter
Caren and Debbie Lieberman
Cameron Miranda
Fran and David Lieberman
Debbie and Alan Goore
Jenise and Marianne of the Sustainable Living Podcast
Support the Podcast
If you’d like to make a contribution to Mother’s Quest to support Season Three of the Podcast and/or help provide coaching scholarships for mothers, follow this link to make a contributionhttp://mothersquest.com/be-a-supporter/
If you would like to “dedicate” an upcoming episode to a special mother in your life, email me at julie@mothersquest.com
—
Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.
Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, Engaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C).
As this episode is released, we are just days away from the two year anniversary of the Charlottesville Rally. I remember waking to the news the next day and deciding I had a responsibility to use my voice and the platform I’m building with the Mother’s Quest Podcast to pursue social justice. Many said “yes” alongside me and The Women Podcasters in Solidarity Initiative was born.
If you’re on a quest to live an E.P.I.C. life, but you’ve been feeling challenged, isolated, or unsure of the path ahead, the Virtual Mother’s Quest Circle may be the source of connection you’re looking for.
